My word for the year is joy.
Which is kind of ironic, considering I’ve been a wee bit short on that specific commodity recently.
I guess you could consider this point in life as my equivalent to hitting the restart button. I was talking to my mom recently, and she said, “Regardless of what everyone else is doing, you need to be doing what you should be doing.” Deep. Simple. Exactly what I needed to hear.
I started a verse-a-day study on joy two days ago. So far, there has been a weird story about Laban angrily chasing down Jacob and his family as they sneaked back to Canaan. He asked, “Why did you sneak away? I could have sent you off with joy and a party.” Jacob said, “I was afraid…”
Fear. Well there is a word that I keep encountering. Fear of not getting a job. Fear of getting a job and getting sick from overworking again. Fear of having people assume I have my life together. Fear of people knowing that I do not. Fear of opportunity cost: if I do one thing, I by nature cannot do other things. Mostly I fear being sold out to the things I want to be sold out to, because I am afraid of my own weaknesses that have caused me to fail at other things in the past.
Is fear what defeats joy or is joy what defeats fear? I don’t know yet, but I’m setting out on an adventure to find out.
Posted at 05:43 pm by RiceFields
This is a test.
Posted at 05:15 pm by RiceFields