May 11, 2016
Joy: Day Two

My word for the year is joy. Which is kind of ironic, considering I’ve been a wee bit short on that specific commodity recently. I guess you could consider this point in life as my equivalent to hitting the restart button. I was talking to my mom recently, and she said, “Regardless of what everyone else is doing, you need to be doing what you should be doing.” Deep. Simple. Exactly what I needed to hear. I started a verse-a-day study on joy two days ago. So far, there has been a weird story about Laban angrily chasing down Jacob and his family as they sneaked back to Canaan. He asked, “Why did you sneak away? I could have sent you off with joy and a party.” Jacob said, “I was afraid…” Fear. Well there is a word that I keep encountering. Fear of not getting a job. Fear of getting a job and getting sick from overworking again. Fear of having people assume I have my life together. Fear of people knowing that I do not. Fear of opportunity cost: if I do one thing, I by nature cannot do other things. Mostly I fear being sold out to the things I want to be sold out to, because I am afraid of my own weaknesses that have caused me to fail at other things in the past. Is fear what defeats joy or is joy what defeats fear? I don’t know yet, but I’m setting out on an adventure to find out.

Posted at 05:43 pm by RiceFields
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